Frustration Dyslexia

232323232%7Ffp53994)nu=;5;;)9;2)242)WSNRCG=353637(23;333nu0mrjWhy is dyslexia discouraging and frustrating?

Social and Emotional Problems Related to Dyslexia
By: Michael Ryan, M.D. and International Dyslexia Association (2004)

The frustration of children with dyslexia often centers on their inability to meet expectations. Their parents and teachers see a bright, enthusiastic child who is not learning to read and write. Time and again, dyslexics and their parents hear, “He’s such a bright child; if only he would try harder.” Ironically, no one knows exactly how hard the dyslexic is trying.
The pain of failing to meet other people’s expectations is surpassed only by dyslexics’ inability to achieve their goals. This is particularly true of those who develop perfectionistic expectations in order to deal with their anxiety. They grow up believing that it is “terrible” to make a mistake.
However, their learning disability, almost by definition means that these children will make many “careless” or “stupid” mistakes. This is extremely frustrating to them, as it makes them feel chronically inadequate.

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15 thoughts on “Frustration Dyslexia

  1. Hi, I do agree with this “‘He’s such a bright child; if only he would try harder.’ Ironically, no one knows exactly how hard the dyslexic is trying.”, but I think only they say this things before they knew the kid is suffering with dyslexia. Being dyslexic doesn’t mean that they should be distinct from others; they should be tottered by their same age or even be criticized. I remembered one expert in medicine said that dyslexics are smarter and talented than we are. True they can’t read fluently or even can’t read at all, but they have the capabilities and the talents more than what we have right now.

  2. My son is not dyslexic but had (and still has) other learning disabilities. In school they’d haul me in every few months to tell me he was “lazy” and ask what I was doing to “discipline” him. By the time they got IEPs and such he was in high school. It was a nightmare.

    Good luck, you have a long hard road ahead.

  3. Hi,
    I had a slight dyslexia when growing up and I can remember my mom finding it out when i was very young. A professional educated me on how to study and informed my teachers on things that they could do to help me. Things like using different color highlighters when reading for terms and facts. Colored sheets to put over pages when I was reading helped me to focus and learn better. I still to this day use the tools that I learned back then. My husband has dyslexia to and so did my father. Some of the most brilliant people have dyslexia and it did not stop them from being successful. My mother told me this 🙂 She said that god has given me a gift to think differently in life, to think outside the box. Which I think to this day has given me the confidence to go my own way. Some classes throughout school were extremely hard for me. But ince i figured out which tools to use to get me through it, i succeeded. Thank goodness for my wonderful mom.

    I can’t believe the teachers said that. They should be better informed by now and learn to adapt to all of the children’s needs in a classroom. Maybe it’s there teaching style that does not keep the attention of your son. Anyways, sorry about this rant. But that comment makes me frustrated too. I am so sorry that you had to hear those words.

  4. I couldn’t agree more… There will also be a percentage of children with Dyslexia who are also gifted in terms of aptitude and potential ability. The social and scholastic expectations of these is an additional stressor… It’s taken me 40 plus years to realise that in my self…My son is gifted and has inherited some of his Dad’s “uncooperative” 🙂 …. When I see my son struggle, and how hie is treated by those around him, the words of a colleague (internationally renowned expert on child self-esteem) and friend of mine come to mind. “It’s the adults in the child’s life that makes a different”… Despite my challenges, I hope that I would be one of those adults in both my children’s lives who have compassion, understanding, and make a difference by being different…

  5. Thank you for visiting my blog and liking my post. When I read the Obama bookstore article, I knew I had to share it. I’m happy you enjoyed it. I just finished writing a review of Thank You, Mr. Falker by Patricia Polacco for a fellow librarian’s site (and will probably post it on my own, This true story made your post all the more meaningful.

  6. Hi, and thanks for the like. My stepson waited many years to be diagnosed with dyslexia, and now receives excellent support at University, as a mature student. I well remember his frustration, and often rage, at not being able to express himself. Good luck with your work. Pete

  7. Pingback: Being different does have some benefits « getting recognised

  8. I want ot say something. Im dyslexic. Im 52, im single, ive never really dated, i have no career other than cleaning pots & pans in a kitchen. My job title is, Kitchen Porter. Ive tryed to fin into several other jobs which i wasnt remotely suited to doing & in which my dyslexia affected me, many aspects of these different jobs. I hear alot of dyslexic people saying theyr dyslexic but they have still achieved in school, in college, in their job / in their marriage, in their life. I ve read so many of these comments, so listen up now. Im dyslexic & i have achieved nothing ..eventhough i have tryed. The one thing im good at is art / painting & its difficult to make a career out of art ..unless you have studio space to begin with & unless your very lucky. I cant do anything else ..except for manual cleaning work. Ie, cleaning kitchens, floors, fridges, toilets, etc. Does my dyslexia effect me doing these menial, manual jobs ?? No. A i proud to even apply for such menial manual work / LONG TERM ? I didnt say short -term or as a stop gap / when your stuck for a job ! Anyway the answer is NO. Im highly embarassed, especially with the type of family i came from / my family back-ground. I come accross to everyone as having no ambition & no drive. Ie, Family, past friends, potential partners, to potential employers, etc, etc. The employers attitude is, well if your stupid enough to present yourself for this kind of work .. then come on in. When would you like to start ? When would you like to be abused ? When would you like to be treated bad / very badly ..with no respect at all. This is what happens when your a dysleic who cant adapt, who isnt achieving, who isnt successful & who is choosing the lowest, worst jobs that you wouldnt wnat your worst enemy to do. This is my world …with absolutely no way out. Hell is a good name to describe my world & my working world / my situation / my dyslexic situation. So we’r not all successful dyslexics. ANd the strang thing is i have tryed o tchange my world, my career, my potential opportunities / my potential work opportunities, but i fail miserably & i either leave or i get asked to leave the job. It happens very quickly. Employers spot your no picking up the training, etc. They see immediate problems & your gone ..before anyone has even noticed. The ones who do let you stay on, ie, the ones who try ot be understanding & say ‘ ok i will give you a three month trial instead of a weeks trial, end up going nuts / crazy re, all the mistakes i make, re, their business really getting messed up. Finally they cant take anymore & im aksked to leave ..or i can see it coming & i get my owrds in first … ‘ im leaving. ‘ ..which is never contested ! Im messed up & i admit it. To add insult to injury i have no future. Ive tryed all of my life, nothing has worked out & a time does come when you say ‘ ok ive had enough of trying, i will just plod along in a terrible job, with terrible money & with a terrible standard / quality of live / forever. Thats it.

  9. I have an 8 year old boy, recently diagnosed with irlens and dyslexia. we are all having such a hard time at home at the moment (it’s a rather long moment… Ever since he started school at almost 5) his agression is getting worse at home and we are struggling to deal with this appropriately. Any guidance would be very much appreciated


    • I find the book volcano in my tummy a great resource for younger children it’s available on Amazon. Think good feel good by Paul stallard is also good as a resource for you to read its CBT for kids.

  10. When i say this once i should be sayingit 1,000 times. Dyslexic scourge, dyslexic curse, no words can describe my hell on earth. I will probably have 70 or 80 years of pure hell. Part of me, a huge part of me is so annoyed. I have to choose the lowest job anyone can do in society as its the job i do best & i have to endure question after question from one new employee, followed by another new employee & so on about why i have chosen the worst job with the least pay & with the least respect in the company. No one asks richard branson why he does what he does for a living …but they ask me why im a cleaner, why do i clean, have i no greater ambition ? We’r both dyslexic but my job is looked down upon. Min wage, low standard of living. This is what the job i do best gives me.

    Am i supposed to tell everyone who asks dyslexic. Do i have to explain myself over & over to each new employee ? Do i have to explain & apologise forever ? If only these people knew what its like to have my brain. If only they knew the hell im in daily, for the rest of my life. Its a hell sentence ..for sure.

    Dyslexic hell.

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